Some of us have issues with co-workers or team mates at work and this takes away our enthusiasm for going to work. You may have a work mate that stresses you out and you don’t know what to do with them anymore. If you are a leader in your work, issues related to team members not getting along well are even more problematic and can really be a headache.
However, before you complain to your boss or before giving the problematic person a memo to shape up, maybe you should try to understand the root cause of their behavior first to understand why they are causing problems for other people.
“It is better to be kind than right.” — Wayne Dyer
You may feel you are right in taking to task a problematic colleague but if you don’t understand why they are acting up in the first place, then you may just be making the situation worse.
Try to turn down your irritation and try to practice kindness instead. Ask yourself these questions and you will be able to put yourself in the right frame of mind to help the person and improve their situation.
- What has your co-worker’s mood been for the past days?
- What usually makes them light up or feel happy?
- What could be going on in this person’s life that makes them anxious, sad or angry
- How are you and your other colleague’s actions or behaviour contributing to this person’s feelings?
- What can you do or say to help this person improve their feelings or situation?
After putting some thought into these questions, you should be able to come up with a plan on how to talk to this co-worker to improve the situation. You can ask your other co-workers to help the person too.
“Before you abuse, criticise, and accuse walk a mile in my shoes.” — Elvis Presley
Being kind and having empathy is not often regarded as a leadership skill. However, we all have experienced how having a great group dynamic starts with better communication and understanding of each person’s unique potential and contribution to the team.
A good colleague and good leader should be able to practice empathy with their team mates to experience more happiness and gain more success in the workplace.
Do you have a colleague who could use some kindness to improve their mood today? Try to practice these questions and see how you can help.